Do you ever have those periods of time when you feel not quite conflicted, but confused about something? It can last a day, a week, a month, a year… I think as humans we have a natural curiosity about us and a desire to understand. At times when we are struggling to fully understand something, it can be difficult to take a back seat and let God work. We tend to want so badly to steer the ship and know the course ahead of time, but life and design doesn’t always go that way. There are times we need to be a passenger aboard the ship of our own lives and let our Captain chart out the course when we are “off”.
What I have come to realize, through many of these times of internal struggle, is that ultimately there is no need to know. We may feel as if we need to know the reasons or outcomes to a certain situation, but spiritual reality tells us time and again how valuable it is to just be present. Learning to trust the Lord, be present and be content not always having the answers is not a recipe I can give you. It is something we must each find within ourselves on this spiritual journey, and Christ teaches us how through His Word and the Word of Our Father. It would seem I will need to repeatedly learn these lessons, but what I recognize is how much shorter the times of angst have become. As soon as I get honest and submit my heart to my Savior, again and again, this feeling of security and comfort crash over me like the waves against the ship I no longer have to captain.
My encouragement for you is this: lean into Jesus with your full heart. Psalm 3:5-6 says, “When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.” You do not have to be ready or comfortable for whatever is happening in your life, but to find peace in your soul, regardless of outside situations, lean in. Give up your desire to control everything and be the sole captain of your ship. You have a captain who will help you navigate around the rocks and the storms! This is not to say you will not experience turbulence or damage, but He will guide you through it. So quit trying to “follow the stars” and let His Word be your guide.
“Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life.” Psalm 143:8
Sometimes this will mean learning how to be still and cope with whatever is occurring. Other times this will mean it is time for you to steer the ship, deal with the rigging or assist in navigation. Let Him lead your heart as to what to do next. the urgency you feel in needing to know and understand can be quieted when you trust in Him. Don’t forget the Jesus took on the worst for you and your debt has been paid. The rest will work out one way or another, especially when you allow Him to calm your heart and mind.
“But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.” Jeremiah 17:7-8
Go forth and send your roots into the stream of the Lord’s everlasting love and unending grace. It is freely given and ready for you to freely receive it. The price has been paid.